I looked at my watch and said, "Good grief, how could you spend so long jilling yourself in the bathroom?"Carol indignantly defended herself, "What sort of sexual pervert do you think I am! I only spent five minutes in the bathroom. Honestly! Just because you've got a dirty mind it doesn't mean everyone else has!" I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply you were a pervert or anything like that. What did you spend all the rest of the time doing then?" If you must know, I was in Julia's bedroom frigging myself with her vibrator, imagining I was playing Hide and Seek with your winkle!"The two girls laughed, and when I mentally climbed out of the trap, I joined in too.Carol said, "Haha. That was fun. You are very easy to set up for embarrassment, you know?" Yes, I know. Believe me, I KNOW! It happens far too often. So what were you really doing then?"The girls immediately started laughing again.#2: After the most recent round of "Let's All Laugh At Mark", Julia said, "You really are sweet,. It had been a painful hour already. Most of her customers had been pretty gentle, especially the boys of the village and the visitors, and had only delivered lightly stinging blows which had not bothered her a lot, but some of the village women in the queue had scarcely been able to believe their luck as they laid viciously into that beautiful and hated bum, about which they had heard with increasingly jealous rage, their husbands and boy friends rhapsodising for so long.Some of the other women had hurt her, but Mrs Patterson's strength and fury were a revelation both to the by now silent onlookers and to the suffering Julia. Everybody expected the poor girl, whose incredible and defiant bravery had captured their absolute and unstinting admiration by this time, to faint away at any moment. Finally the ordeal was over. Mrs Patterson laid down the strop, breathing heavily after her exertion, into which she had thrown her all."How did you loike that you dirty, stuck up, toffee nosed.
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